Many if not all of us have had an experience with rejection. This means that a situation presented an opportunity which you may have thought that was a positive for you, but it turns out it was not – instead, it was rejected – and that rejection ended up to have affected you in one way or another.
Rejection can be defined as the act of pushing someone or something away. One may experience rejection from one’s family of origin, a friend, or a romantic partner, and the resulting emotions can often be painful. Rejection can be experienced on a large scale or in small ways in everyday life. While rejection is typically part of life, some types of rejection may be more difficult to cope with than others.
Rejection can also result from life events not involving relationships, such as being turned down for a desired position at work or receiving a rejection letter from a college. While any rejection can be painful, some instances of rejection may be more impactful than others. Because most humans desire social contact, and many people crave acceptance from society, being rejected can incite negative feelings and emotions.
Rejection has capacity to stir up all kinds of unpleasant feelings. Understanding why they are painful can help us form productive responses and move toward recovery and healing. If you struggle with rejection and want nonjudgmental guidance, contact a licensed therapist. So is rejection good? Here are a few cases in point that indicate rejection can be a good thing!
Rejection is a chance to regroup and refocus.
When you’ve set your heart on something, whether an idea or a job opportunity, being rejected is an absolute disappointment. Afterward, it’s easy to focus on what went wrong. If only I said this, if only I did that. Hanging onto these questions is a foolproof way to turn rejection into a roadblock. Granted, replaying a situation is crucial to understanding it. However, bathing in the “should haves” inhibits your potential to learn as growth opportunities morph into a pool of regrets. Regrets are exactly what hold you back, and may lead to more depressive symptoms than those who let it go.
Look at rejection as a stepping stone.
When you do, you realize that those difficult experiences helped lead you to other successes in your life. Specifically, it highlights habits, actions, or thoughts that you can improve on. It helps you shift your focus from how you messed up to how you can become better. Of course, refocusing doesn’t mean changing yourself according to someone else’s standards. A rejection isn’t a reflection of your abilities, talents, or self-worth. And it certainly doesn’t mean that you’re inadequate. Use rejection as a prescriptive moment for yourself. Remember each crisis reveals the dynamics and tools we need to jumpstart self development, proving that rejection can be an amazingly empowering thing.
See rejection as a way of getting on the right track.
Rejection happens when you try for something and it doesn’t work out. This can be anything from a networking letdown to an ignored email. According to the other person, something was missing. Maybe it was certain qualifications or specific vibes they wanted to feel. Again, this doesn’t speak to your character or abilities; instead, it displays the standards that they are using to make a decision.
Rejection could be a favor
So, how is that a favor? However, it is actually a favor in disguise. It increases your chances for finding a situation that is better in line with your own views and values. In this way, you work with someone who sees your potential and appreciates all that you do have to offer.
Rejection is a catalyst for strength
Rejection becomes easier the more you experience it. Continuously running into it means that you’re seeking opportunity—that’s a courageous thing! And every time you rise from a rejection situation, you come out a little bit stronger. The more times you hear “no,” the easier it becomes to handle it with grace and poise. And then you’ll try for something else because you know that you’ll be just fine if you get rejected again. Soon you’ll be less likely to skirt away from challenges and risks. And you’ll give yourself more shots at achieving something awesome.
Occasional rejections make celebrations that much sweeter.
It’s not uncommon for a bout of rejection to harvest a jumble of unhappy feelings. But if everything always worked out, the good would just become the ordinary. There wouldn’t be anything to celebrate or savor. In Choose the Life You Want: The Mindful Way to Happiness, Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., reminds us that the most successful people have experienced the most rejections. Need proof? Walt Disney was turned down by 302 bankers before he finally got funding for Disneyland. J. K. Rowling had twelve publishers scoff at Harry Potter. Steve Jobs was fired by his own company before being asked back years later, and Optiven is an offshoot of 15 failed businesses, to become the iconic real estate company it is today!
In conclusion, getting rejected means you’re trying something new. It might take a few tries before something works out, and that’s all right. Hardly anything works out well the first time around. Remember, perception is key. Everything changes when you view at it as part of the process, not the outcome. By adopting these healthy thinking habits, you can transform the way you handle rejection. It will take time and practice, but it will be worth it. Rejection may have once been about surviving, but now it’s also the key to thriving.
The author, is a leading Entrepreneur, a Published Author, Philanthropist, Youth Empowerment Enthusiast, a Family man and CEO of Optiven Group.